Love

Ive been wanting to blog about this for a while now but never thought I could express myself clearly. Im going to give it a try now.

Love to me is more than a feeling, it surrounds me. God's love makes me wonder how he loves? I have seen love die, I have seen love survive through anything, I have seen love slowly fade away. I have felt love and lost love. Love hurts, it is awesome, exciting, scary... there are many feeling for love.

I must admit I am scared to truely love somebody, not because of a past experience, but because I have seen what love that is lost does to people. When my parents divorced I got a skewed look at love. I thought love was something that is there one minute and gone the next. Now I look at my brothers marriage, it may not last through the end of the year(prayer would be appreciated), and I wonder is this what love is? but on the other spectrum I look at my grandparents, they have been together over fifty years, this gives me hope.

but in processing my feelings I want to love like God loves us but as humans I dont think that is possible. I think the conclusion I am coming to is God's love is the one and only love that can stand the test of time. If I were to get mad at God and ignore him for months or even years, he would still love me. If I were to do that to someone I loved, that person might move on.

I hope this all makes sense to you, it does to me. I think its just something I needed to write out. I guess the saying is true, "it is better to have love and lost, than to have never loved at all."